Romney, Zombies, and Fall-themed Couscous

I want to have a beautiful life. That's all. It doesn't sound all that complicated when i see it written down. Some people want to have money, or a phD, fame, fortune, a family. I just want to be at peace.

Right now I would settle for falling asleep or sleeping through the night. No matter how loud the volume on the tv is it doesn't seem to drown out my anxiety on those nights. What if I lose my job? Heaven forbid something happens to Ethan. What if we can't pay back our debts? What if I never figure out what I want to do? and then it escalates to the threat of a Romney presidency, melting polar ice caps and a seemingly inevitable zombie apocalypse if you believe the TV.

The trouble with anxiety is that no matter how crazy it seems the next morning, in the moment it is very real and incredibly imminent. You'd swear that all these things will happen to you as soon as your alarm sounds. So really the only combatant is to not sleep.

Or just watch South Park until my eyes literally roll back in my head.

Roasted Apple and Butternut Squash Couscous

If you're looking for a good way to take advantage of the fall harvest, try this! I read about roasted apples for a really delicious looking cake on my favorite website (smittenkitchen.com!) and i thought wow! what an interesting technique. So I had some apples kicking around and a butternut squash (my favorite squash!) and decided to give the whole thing a shot. 

I used 1 braeburn apple but in retrospect I suppose I would have used a better looking cortland. Cube everything up and throw it in the oven at 375˚ with a little bit of olive oil. Cook until the squash is soft (~ 25 m) and about 20 m for the apples. You only have to use a little bit of squash (3/4 c).

Prepare your couscous and toss together with 1/4 tsp. onion powder, salt and pepper. Since it's a little sweet because of the apples, it would go really well with something salty, like chicken or fish.  I've thought about it and I don't really know that the whole thing would work with any vehicle besides couscous, but if you have any ideas, let me know!

Veggie Fritters: a better way to eat vegetables you don't like!

Over the last couple years I've had a lot of hateful things to say about my experiences at Smith College. It can't be for everyone. It wasn't for me. And I've wondered whether, knowing what I know now, I would have changed my decision to attend - chosen instead to move to North Carolina or Worcester or Amherst. Would I have had a better experience? A different experience - that's for sure. 

But hindsight is 20/20. Someone I dislike dearly was always saying that. And I'm like "DUH", but seriously - it's so much easier to sit on my couch now and pretend I knew what I was doing all that time. You can have a plan, it might even be a super-awesome incredible plan! Then one day you can wake up somewhere you never thought you would be and go, "shit. this isn't the person i want to be! this isn't the day i want to have."But what is the day you want to have? Who is the person you want to be? And then you say "shit" again, because you don't know. 

Have you ever heard the Baz Luhrmann song "Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen"? If you haven't, and you weren't at the Gateway High School Graduation for the class of 2007, you should youtube it right now. Every time that I listen to it, it's relevant. But about five years ago, I never paid much attention to this part:

"Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life.

The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone."

Now I think about it all the time. Am I going to be one of those 40 year olds ?!

I can still be an interesting, good person if I don't know where I'm going, right? Well, somedays it feels like it and some days it doesn't. I guess that's the way it is.

My only other advice to you: eat vegetables.

Veggie Fritters a million ways

Say you have a lot of broccoli. Or you think you should start dieting so in an effort to eat healthier you BUY a lot of broccoli and then you are like... shit. I have all this broccoli. What ever will I do? And then you get over the idea of eating healthier and break out the cheese and oil and the frying pan. In the end you aren't really any healthier but you can pretend if you want!

So you take your 3 cups of broccoli (or whatever veggie as long as it's nothing too soft, mushrooms would be great or peppers) and chop it up into chunks. Use the stems too, they r just as good! Just slice or peel the tough outer part off. Steam for 5-6 min. DO NOT OVERCOOK! You'll be so sad. Meanwhile beat 1 egg in a large bowl with 1/2 c. flour, 1/3 c. parmesan (not shaker, if you can help it) 1 clove smashed garlic, salt and pepper. Add broccoli and mash together with a potato masher (preferably the kind that looks like a squiggle). Only mash a few times to break down broccoli, you're not making a paste here. (If you've got anything else in the fridge you're looking to get rid of this is a good time to throw it in). Fold the rest of it together. Finally heat a medium skillet with 2-3 TBS olive oil+vegetable oil. Don't jump the gun and put your first one in before the oil is completely heated or you'll have one soggy fritter. Drop 2-3 TBS of batter in the skillet and flatten with whatever you have handy. Heat 2-3 min. flip. Heat 1-2 min. If you're really going to do it, do a test run where you cook only one fritter in the pan before you go pro and try to cook a few at a time.

We had these with a lemon sour cream sauce (super easy - if you only have a little bit of sour cream, just squirt a tbs or so of lemon juice into the container and shake, just don't forget to label it if you're going to put it back in the fridge.. whoops).

Dear September, sneaking up on me like that is not very nice...

OMG ITS SEPTEMBER AGAIN. OMG. OMG.

How did that happen? One day your graduating college and the next! BOOM! September roles around again and your sitting on your behind at 11:00 on a Tuesday watching CSI:NY. There might be Ben & Jerry's involved. It's very odd, not going back to school when you've associated September with books and notes and Smith College Convocation for so many years but my new job is keeping me busy - very busy.
Ethan HATES the Fall. I put it in caps because he is really serious about it. When everyone else is winding up for school, ooOOoing and AAhhhhing at the leaves changing and drinking apple cider, Ethan is being a hater.  So I made him these cookies:

Nutella or Peanut Butter Stuffed, Brown Butter Chocolate Chip Cookies

They look absolutely delicious. I know. They make you want a chocolate chip cookie at this very moment! Well you are in luck dear reader, if you have a little extra time in your day (and who really does right now?) for a cookie with a little something extra in the middle. Just think - you deserve it! Now at first glance you think, just an ordinary cookie recipe and it is... but it isn't because of this pesky brown butter aspect. Now let me tell you, browning butter isn't hard ... but it isn't all rainbows and daffodils either.  After you've mixed all your dry ingredients (2 c. flour, 1 tsp baking powder, 1/4 tsp salt) get your sauce pan out. Now if you have a stupid oven like mine, you'll have to figure out what medium actually means then and add 12 TBS butter (cut them as evenly as possible). Whisk this constantly until it has a nutty smell to it - sometime shortly after the frothing has subsided. Remove from heat, cool briefly, and add to 1 c. dark brown sugar and 1 c. granulated sugar. Add in 1 egg and 1 1/2 tsp vanilla. Add your dry ingredients and then fold in chocolate chips - its really up to you how chippy you like them. I do about 1 1/2 c. of whatevs mix of chips I have in the cupboard. Set this mixture in the fridge for 1-2 hrs. YES, THIS STEP IS IMPORTANT. Trust me. 

Wait. Its hard, i know. 

When you're ready preheat your oven to 350˚F. Take a spoonful of dough (you know the smaller one, not the biggest one in the drawer) and flatten it out in your palm. Add your peanut butter or nutella and fold the edges up to seal. Make sure its sealed! You don't want nutella dripping out all over your  baking sheet and oven making a big old mess in there. Squash down a little tad and bake 9-11 minutes! (really only cook them for 9, if you don't want little hockey pucks when they've cooled).