Dinner for One: Stonewall Kitchen Pumpkin Soup

Hello again and welcome back!


If you've been following along, you'll know I've been ignoring this blog, the kitchen, and you for at least a few weeks now, maybe longer.

Turns out I'm a crappy cook and writer (...and maybe girlfriend?) while my life is undergoing  upheaval.

But things are sorting themselves out. I'll be starting a new job on Monday which is exciting and terrifying.  And for now I'm settling into a kind of peace with things. So onward! and into the kitchen!

You'll also be pleased to know that my life is now a little bit more complete since I've been to the Stonewall Kitchen store in Portland, ME. It's like being in a toy store.

Stonewall Kitchen Pumpkin Soup

(kind-of-only-a-little altered by me)

(vegetarian and gluten-free if you don't top with delicious, gluten-y croutons) 

(this version makes one dinner-sized portion and a second, smaller lunch-sized portion)

What will you need?

1 TBS olive oil or butter (I do half and half)

1/2 small onion, diced

1 carrot, diced (I am really into carrots lately)

1 shake garlic powder

2 small potatoes, cubed

1 c. chicken broth (gluten-free, if you must)

1/4 c. Stonewall Kitchen Maple-Pumpkin Butter (or to taste, you might want to just add by the TBS   full if you are skeptical about how pumpkin-y you would like it)

3/4 c. cream (half and half, light, whole milk or whatever is in the fridge)

salt and pepper

If we're being professional about it, start by dicing your vegetables

Add your butter and olive oil (or whatever) to a pot

 Once heated, add onions and carrots (and garlic powder). Cook 2-3 minutes over medium heat or until onions are soft.

Add potatoes and broth and bring to a boil.

 Once potatoes are soft, remove from heat and put in your handy blender or otherwise use an immersion blender, if you are cool like that. You could mash them too, I suppose, if you weren't attached to a puree texture.

Place mush-like mixture back in pot over medium-ish heat and add cream and the quarterback of this recipe, the Maple Pumpkin Butter. Taste regularly to make sure you are achieving the right level of pumpkin for you.

Heat gently and enjoy! I had mine with cheddar cheese and croutons

 view the original recipe at www.stonewallkitchen.com/recipes/soups/vegetable-soups

Review from the road: 3 potato 4

3 Potato 4

Food: 4 out of 5
Overall: 3.5 out of 5 (limited menu)

Unfortunately I forgot to take photos so you will just have to imagine. This is a cool little spot in historic Salem inside the mall near the parking garage. Since Ethan has been eating gluten free we've had to get creative in finding food on vacation. This little shop only serves potatoes - regular or sweet - wedged or waffled - that's it. Potatoes are their thing.

After getting over my initial disappointment that they wouldn't make me a baked potato I learned that they have about 15 different freshly made sauces including jalapeno barbecue, pesto mayo, honey mustard, and our favorite - sundried tomato basil ketchup. These were fabulous and we got to taste test a few of the sauces after we chatted with the guy there for a while.

The potatoes are baked, not fried, so they don't feel greasy or heavy when you are eating them. We got a sweet potato/potato combo, both agreeing that the sweet potatoes outweighed the regular potatoes in terms of flavor, but smothered in honey mustard, both were equally delicious.

It was kind of odd that they don't sell anything other than potatoes. With a whole storefront it seems like you would need more than spuds to keep a business going. But apparently it is working for them with other shops in major cities like Las Vegas and San Francisco. Anyway, the limited menu is really the only downside. The store itself is very cool and innovative - they have neat cone-shaped to-go cups with circular holders built into the counter so you can set them down to add salt, pepper, bacon salt( freaky).

I think Salem itself was kind of disappointing although they do have a few cute shops and one awesome bookstore. We got kind of lost and that is always a downer. The highlight of the trip was definitely the Nightmare Gallery across from the wax museum (which was SUPER LAME). We had the best time checking out all the horror movie icons and its nice to see a place run by someone who obviously cares so much about the place.

Don't Burn the Bread and Other Lessons From the Kitchen

Lessons from the Kitchen
coping with the anxiety of the unknown, cooking, eating, and loving the life you have

You know what is silly? When we put a timetable on our emotions.

For instance, I say, "In one year, I will feel differently".

That's a BFL. Big fat lie.

You might feel differently in a year. You might be a different person in a year.  But if you're me, or someone else who suffers the agonies of overactive anxiety, you might still feel the same. The tidal wave of guilt and dread still comes for you at night or when you are driving in the car - breathing cold air into your lungs.

The catalyst is different though, in time. The pressure to succeed and excel are replaced with threats of ends that don't meet and words that aren't said. Where the former felt sudden and urgent, the latter looms in the distance, rumbling, the kind of thunder you feel before you hear.

And the problem with the anxiety is, it seems to me, that there is always a storm blowing in. Whether it's real or not.

___________________________________________________________________________

Other lessons from the Kitchen

1. Don't burn the bread. Learn your oven. Distrust recipes.

2. Don't leave the milk on the counter. Ethan gets mad.

3. "If you're afraid of butter, use cream" - Julia Child. "Or use both" - Me.

4. Jars of roasted red peppers won't last forever. Even in the back of your fridge.

5. Pillsbury crescent rolls have an expiration date.

6. Drinking wine while you cook will make your food taste better - possibly because you won't be able to taste it. Proceed with caution/make sure someone is there to supervise you.

7. Unplug your smoke detector when you break out the cast-iron.

8. The satisfaction of understanding exactly what is in your food is better than the convenience of take-out/applebees/hamburger helper or even leancuisine.

9. Don't let other people tell you how or what you should be eating. Aside from the obvious medical situations, food should be a happy experience.  It should make you feel happy and full. If it doesn't - if it's a chore - find something better. Don't feel bad when your friend says "you do know triscuits are bad for you, right?" - "you do know that you're not supposed to eat anything stored in tin cans anymore, right?" - "you do know that there is a low-fat/low-sugar/low-calorie version, right?" Shut up.

I'll eat what I want, thank you. And if I'm happy and healthy than I will eat my triscuits and canned corn and full-fat meals. You can eat your lettuce and be sad.

10. Cooking is love. Enjoy it. Work at it. Even when it's hard.

____________________________________________________________________

Blueberry Maple Scones
It's still summer because there are fresh blueberries in my fridge but when I wake up in the morning it feels like fall. Here's to not having to decide which I like more:

What will you need?
 3/4 - 1 c. fresh blueberries (or whatever)
2 1/4 c. flour or cake flour (see below)
1 TBS baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 c. maple sugar (or just sugar)
6 TBS butter, chilled in the freezer
1 c. heavy cream

Icing
1/2 c. powdered sugar
1 TBS maple syrup
1 tsp heavy cream or milk

Preheat your oven to 400˚F. Regular flour will do just fine but if you are willing to give it a try you can easily "make" cake flour by removing 2 TBS flour from the cup of flour and adding 2 TBS corn starch.

 Sift your flour/corn starch, salt, and baking powder. Add sugar.

 Grate 6 TBS chilled butter into your flour mixture. If you insist on not grating the butter, cube it up and cut it into your flour mixture with two butter knives.

 Gently mix in your blueberries, coat lightly with flour. Add heavy cream and mix very gently with a wooden spoon. You are probably going to just have to stick your hands in there, so be ready for that.

 If they don't seem like they are coming together nicely into a ball, or you screw it up like me and have to make two balls, add a little more cream or milk. Add 1 tsp at a time until the dough comes together.

 Roll out your dough into a pancake-looking-thing about 3/4 inch thick. Use the top of a cup or cookie cutter (or a knife if you want to be real rugged about it) to make your circles or whatever. Mine are about ~3" in diameter. If you want to go smaller or larger, make sure to adjust your cooking time.

Pop onto your lined cookie sheet.

Bake 15 minutes or until the tops start to look lightly browned. Meanwhile, make your maple glaze. Add to the tops after you set them to cool. Makes 11 3" scones.

...Also

I made Kale Chips because you just insisted they are the best thing ever.

Kale Chips: because apparently they are the bees-knees.

Let's face it. The internet does not need another kale recipe. Lets just say, get some kale:

Remove the stems, put some oil and salt on it, put it in the oven at 400 until it looks like this:

(As you can see I added cheese, because I love cheese and it makes everything better)

They are OK - not my fave - but I can see why they are an easy snack.

You wish you were eating this ... Chocolate Zucchini Bread

Zucchini bread is the precursor to Fall's Pumpkin bread and a staple for summers overflowing with extra zucchini. Unfortunately for me, our apartment gets about 2 hours of light during the day, so we decided not to grow anything this year except for some basil. Between the idea of having a garden and getting a dog, I am really loving the idea of having a house.

This bread probably falls on the top of the "10 best things I've ever made" list. Probably somewhere between 5 and 10, after zucchini bread from the farm which is an unwritten, un-duplicatable recipe in my head that requires actually being on a farm and must be eaten after-dinner as well as for breakfast, with eggs, over-easy.

This bread has been adapted from the best zucchini bread recipe in the world which is similar to zucchini bread from the farm... except its not on a farm. And although I will claim some credit for adapting the chocolate recipe, the original zucchini bread recipe is a treasured secret.

The fact that there are 2 zucchini breads on my list of top 10 best things I've ever made, and a third one is pumpkin bread, must say something about me.

Chocolate Zucchini Bread

What will you need? 

(Makes 1 loaf)

2 eggs

1 c. sugar (I always attempt to cut the sugar in recipes, but I am telling you, from experience, 

                  DON'T DO IT. If you must, use 3/4 c. and it will still be fabulous - also tested, by me)

1 tsp vanilla

1/2 c. oil (normally, I would also substitute some of this but DON'T. Trust me.)

1 1/4 c. grated zucchini (This is about 1 small-ish zucchini)

1 1/2 c. flour

1/8 tsp. baking powder

1 tsp. baking soda

1 1/2 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp salt

1/4 c. cocoa powder (I'm sure dutch-pressed or some other fancy cocoa that had been powdered          by fallen angels playing the harp would be extra-awesome, but I just used Hershey's and it came out just fine!)

1/4 c. chocolate chips - if you want!! (or nuts! nuts would be great too)

What to do?

Now this is pretty easy:

1. Mix all your ingredients, adding the zucchini last. DO NOT FOR ANY REASON attempt to squeeze the liquid out of the zucchini before mixing it. 

2. Bake at 350˚F for 35-40 minutes or until a knife comes out clean when stuck in the center. 

Eat heated with butter, for best results.

Notes: If you are making a double batch (2 loaves), you only have to use 3 eggs. Or be a rebel and use 4 anyway.

Eat More Kale. Here's Why:

I don't know if I am one to talk. Today instead of going for a run, I sat on the couch watching SYTYCD and eating Turkey Hill's Double Dunk chocolate ice cream.

Main message: you think you don't like kale but that's not true. Here's some things to like about kale:

1. It is cheaper than dirt.

2. It doesn't have to taste like dirt.

3. Kale was popular in Europe throughout the Middle Ages and during WWII in Europe because it is easy to grow and contains abundant nutrients.

4. One variety of kale is referred to as 'Hungry Gap' because it can be harvested into the early winter.

5. It contains Vitamins C & K, beta carotene, sulphorophane and a host of other things you can see here (at least 20 other daily requirements):  http://ndb.nal.usda.gov/ndb/foods/show/2969?qlookup=11234&format=Full&max=25&man=&lfacet=&new=1 

6. Several studies link nutrients in kale to decreases in risk for cancer, as well as lowering cholesterol.

Here is how I know you can eat kale: Ethan did. And you should see how he looked at it when he saw it in the refrigerator. He has a deep distrust of leafy green things not disguised as lettuce.

Massaged Kale Salad with Carrots and Dried Cranberries

 REMINDER: this will not taste like dirt

See? Doesn't that look like a nice, harmless, salad?

What will you need?

Salad

Some (curly) kale (If I am making salad for myself, I use about 1-1.5 leaves)

carrots (i like mine shredded, personally)

dried cranberries

flaked parmesan (or whatever cheese, really)

whatever else you want in your salad! it's your salad!

~1 TBS olive oil

~ 1 tsp lemon juice

Dressing (just give this dressing a try, before you go ranch-ing it up)

1.5 TBS olive oil

1+ tsp Apple Cider vinegar (or if you are a pro vinaigrette-maker, use whatever proportions YOU like)

1 chive, minced or onion, if that's what you have

1 clove garlic, crushed

1 tad honey or mustard, either is delicious

What to do?
1. First, de-stem your kale and cut it up. I prefer to roll the leaves and slice them in strips. The texture changes when you massage it, so don't go expecting lettuce.

2. Place all of your kale in a medium bowl with your lemon juice and olive oil. Massage with your hands - YES! do it! - for 1-2 minutes. The texture and color should change, becoming softer and darker green.

3. Mix your dressing ingredients. Probably taste it first, if vinaigrettes are new to your kitchen prowess. Set aside. (Its really better if you let it sit for, like and hour, but ain't nobody got time for that.)

4. Add all the other junk to your salad.

5. Mix dressing. All done.

ps. There are like 500 ways to cook kale. There are entire blogs dedicated to this stuff. Although i had eaten massaged kale salad a few times before, I had never figured out how to make it. Luckily, the BigY people really know what is going on in their featured recipes book. Just give it a try. Even if you don't LOVE it, it's still better for you then most of the things you are eating. Unless you have a perfect diet. In that case, stop reading my blog.

Jobs Forecast: Gloomy, but atleast there is Butternut Squash Risotto

Even though I am sure I cannot remember what I expected to happen 1 short year ago, I am positive that it wasn't this. Not that this is bad. This has actually been pretty great. I am cooking, baking, sewing, eating (a lot!), drinking, finding out that there are so many things I like doing that don't involve books! (or tests, or reviews, or grades)! Who knew.

I don't know that it's harder than I imagined, whatever I imagined, but it's so different. I didn't expect to be so lost in the job market. In the last year, I have probably applied to ... atleast 60 jobs. I've had 8. I guess I thought everything would get clearer. Instead, I'm still looking through my drunk goggles, now they just have a rosy hue to them.

How are you supposed to get a grip on the future?

What a luxury, I know, to be able to spend all this time considering the future. How dare I, spend all this time writing about the woes of decision making. It's incredibly selfish. But I know. I understand. Many times, there isn't any opportunity to consider. It's do or die. It's survive.

And if that was the case, I would. Survive.

Butternut Squash Risotto

I am eating frozen pizza while I write this, so you can just imagine how the food-class in my house must fluctuate.

Risotto is a magical sort of monster. It sounds fancy and scary. Maybe you don't like rice. And you have to stir constantly for 25 minutes! See, all these things are working against you. But you should do it. At least once in your life. And you will see it is not very hard at all!...Just get some wine and a friend to talk to you while your arm goes dead.

What will you need? 

(Keeping in mind, I am making this for 2, but it would really serve 4)

2 TBS olive oil

1 small butternut squash, cubed

1 c. Arborio rice (yes it has to be arborio)

4 c. (1 quart) chicken broth (or vegetable) 

1/4 c. onions, diced (onions are onions, use whichever you please)

1/4 c. Parmesan cheese

2 TBS cream (not necessary, but still good!)

1 tsp parsley 

salt + pepper

First things first, cube up your squash, small, and throw in a pan with 2 TBS olive oil, salt and pepper over medium heat.  

 Cook until you can mash with a fork. Mash lightly and remove from heat, set aside.

Measure out 1 c.-ish arborio rice. Also pour broth into saucepan and heat on low until warm.

 In the same pan you have removed the squash from, add onions. Cook until soft-ish (3-4 minutes). Add rice.

Stir rice with onions for ~1 minute. Add warm broth gradually (1/2 cups at a time), waiting each time to add the next until the last is fully absorbed (you are in your stirring marathon at this point). So keep stirring! You can do it!

Keep going!

If your rice still isn't done and you are coming to the end of your broth, add some water to the pan. When your rice is just nearly done, add butternut squash mash.

Keep stirring!

Add cheese, cream and parsley. Probably more pepper, but taste it first and decide.

And BOOM! Risotto. 

Cheeseburger Blues

This is what happens when I try to be a vegetarian for like... 1 day.

I've been dreaming of cheeseburgers. Not kidding. Last night I went to bed imagining fried chicken, sausages, and cheeseburgers with all the worst stuff on them... bacon. cheese. mushrooms. the kitchen sink. All delicious. I probably could have eaten one right then and there but, just my luck, it was after midnight and the Price Chopper was closed.

I had to work until 6:30 tonight and by the end all I could think about was getting to the BigY.  Since Ethan's been gone in Atlanta I've not been doing a fantastic job feeding myself. Instead of grocery shopping (one of my favorite activities) I've been eating through the food in the house we don't eat (cans of tuna, jars of sauce, you know that stuff at the back of the cabinets? yea, that stuff). We were pretty much down to a container of mushrooms, some lettuce, and like every condiment ever (and it should go without saying, coffee, duh).

So after a few days of refusing to go to the store to buy anything, I hadn't eaten any meat since at least ... Tuesday morning? I honestly can't remember. So it is Friday and I was salivating over smells wafting in my car window. Even at the Mobil. Gross.

I get home with my burger - bleu cheese - and I get ready to cook it

Mind you, this is the first burger I have EVER cooked in my adult life completely unattended. Cooking meat that isn't chicken or fish is DEFINITELY Ethan's department. But I'm an independent woman and such so here I go:

And then....

dun
dun
dun

I nearly burn down the house.  Smoke everywhere! No lie there was probably so much smoke coming out of my window, I am entirely surprised the nosy lady across the street didn't call the police.

But when the smoke cleared... or just lessened, the burger itself didn't seem so bad. Until I ate it. And it just wasn't the mouth watering, juicy, delicious burger of my dreams.

Sad face.

And then I realized, what I really wanted is for Ethan to come home from Atlanta and make me good tasting cheeseburgers and just be home, in general.  So until he comes home (~24 hours), I will revert to my scavenger, vegetarian ways.

My Eskimo

"The loss, you know what I mean? The... the disappointment in yourself. The anger that turns into disappointment. The despair.

Like the guy who's sittin' at the bar and a priest walks in, pulls up a chair. The guy says, "Wait a minute." He says, "I hate to tell you this, don't waste you're time, but I happen to know there's no God." The priest says, "Yeah, how's that?" The guy says...

"I am an explorer in the north pole. I've been caught in a blindin' storm once. Freezing. I was blinded, freezing to death and I prayed, if there is a God, save me now. Now God didn't come."

The priest says... you know, "How's that?" He says, "You're alive. He must have saved you."

He said, "No. God never showed up. An Eskimo came along. Took me back to his camp and saved me." That's Janice. She's my wife and she's sittin' right there. She's my Eskimo." (The Town, 2009)

...

Imagine you are a swimmer. You've been a swimmer all your life. And one morning you wake up, or maybe it's been happening gradually, you can't remember, but you wake up and your pool has become a big, tumultuous, roaring ocean. The waves are crashing around you, there is salt in your eyes and its hard to keep your head above the water. You are drowning.

You've been treading water, floating on your back, grasping for safe harbor for hours, maybe months, who is keeping track. Where is the lifeguard?! You might say, to yourself, angrily. You have forgotten. You are the lifeguard. No one is coming for you.

Vulnerable, you float alone in your ocean. You pass in and out of consciousness - in and out of reality. Each time you think you see the glimmer of shore in the distance, you cannot reach it. It moves farther and farther from you the faster you swim. You are thrashing and kicking but you never reach refuge. So you float, helpless. Defeated.

When you have finally given up hope of rescue, admitted you can no longer fight - it is over -

there they are.

But they do not reach into the swirling, whirlpool you are spinning in to pull you to shore.

They do not lift your lifeless body from the waves. They say

swim.

They say, swim. You can. You will. You are strong.

They say, I will wait for you on the shore. swim.

Now in that moment, you can choose to not trust this. No one has come for you before. You have been alone. You are mad. You scream, "leave me! let me die here!".  Maybe not your body, but your soul. Your ability to love. To love yourself. You let your pool become an ocean, after all.

Or you can swim. For your life. For your love. For your self.

And when you reach the shore, because you will reach it, even if it takes hours or weeks or years, you will be ready. You will be changed.  And when they come to take your hand, your ocean will slip away, shrinking to nothing, a puddle.  You are too strong now to let that sea take this from you. This opportunity to live. To love.


I have fought for this life but

you are my beacon of hope.

...

I have been working on this from some time now, and if you know me well enough, you'll have to excuse my swimmer's metaphor. It is ultimately, the most fitting.

Cocoa Devil's Food Cake

It is maybe unethical of me to make this cake only because of the yogurt in my fridge that is about to go bad. And because I went running. So I can eat all the cake I want! Right?

It might seem like I haven't been cooking lately... but you would be wrong! I've made lots of good stuff from Joy (and some not so good...my fault), including risotto (my first!), pork chops, and cinnamon raisin milk bread. But these past few weeks... have been quite testing. My head has been too full to write anything worth reading.

What will you need ?

2 c. cake flour (or 2 cups reg. flour - 4 TBS flour + 4 TBS corn starch)

1 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp salt

1 c. sugar

1 c. buttermilk or yogurt

1/2 c. cocoa powder

1 tsp vanilla

1/2 c. butter

1 c. sugar

2 large eggs

Icing (of some kind - you'll have to get creative - mine was awful.)

Sift together cake flour, baking soda and salt. If you "made your own" cake flour. Sift it to death. 

In a separate bowl, whisk together 1 c. sugar,1 c. buttermilk or yogurt, 1/2 c. cocoa powder, 1 tsp vanilla. It should look similar to what cake batter from a box looks like. 

In a bowl, or your sweet Kitchenaid mixer, combine softened butter and 1 c. sugar. Beat on high until fluffy. Add your flour mixture, alternating with the chocolate mixture, until combined. 

Put in 2 9x9 cake pans and bake 25-30 minutes at 350˚F (checking frequently toward the end).

Frost and eat!

The Real Roux

~ 1 year ago, I made my first roux. If you don't have a clue what I am talking about, a roux is a "thickener for savory sauces" and is your most common base for your white sauces and cheese sauces and that liquidy stuff inside your chicken pot pie. I promise, even if you still don't know what I am talking about, you love a good roux. And you want to be able to make one quickly and without too much thought. It's just butter and flour after all.

Nevertheless, when I first attempted cheese sauce (gorgonzola of course, if you know Ethan, you'll know he has a weak spot for anything gorgonzola), I was running around like a chicken with its head cut off because I was sure I would ruin it. Of course I would ruin it. That's my MO.

But one full year of practice later, I have created the perfect gorgonzola sauce. 

There are, technically speaking, 3 types of roux: white, blonde and brown. They vary depending mostly on how long they are cooked (and how they taste and what you would use them for).   Today I am making a white roux for gorgonzola sauce with pasta. But I won't tell you how to make the gorgonzola sauce. It's a secret. But I'll give you one hint:

Drink at least 4 glasses of Moscato while preparing it.

Not kidding.

Béchamel sauce

(i.e. white sauce, i am trying to expand my vocabulary)

 

What will you need to make a roux?
2 TBS BUTTER (DO NOT use a butter "alternative". You will bring shame to your family.)
2 TBS Flour 

What will you need to make white sauce?
1 c. milk (and/or cream)



What will you need to make gorgonzola sauce?
Gorgonzola

secret ingredients. Get your own. 

Melt 2 TBS butter over low/medium heat

Add 2 TBS flour and whisk over heat until fully combined (~1-1 1/2 minutes).

Meanwhile, scald 1 cup milk in a separate pan. If you need practice multitasking, this is a good exercise. I have made this both with and without scalding the milk and I would testify that scalding is the way to go, even if it is a pain in the ass. It really deepens the flavor of the sauce and aids in consistency.

Heat the milk until small bubbles start to form around the edge of the pan, no more, no less. Add milk to your roux a bit at a time, whisking constantly until combined.

Continue whisking over heat until the sauce begins to thicken. Thicker is better, because you can always thin with more milk if necessary. At this point add all your secret ingredients and continue stirring until desired consistency is reached.

At this point, I don't suggest using cheddar unless you have a game-plan already (please please share it with me!). I've attempted several times and it always becomes a regular disaster - bad consistency, bad flavor - its a dinner nightmare.

Combine sauce with 2 cups cooked pasta to feed your hungry boyfriend.